Felicia sings a Special Song for her Sister Janie. Songs can bring back good memories and happy thoughts. Your Journey Of You
Category: JOY Principles
NEW YEAR’s EVE DANCE
Watch Felicia and Brian Enjoying Dancing on New Year’s Eve at the Murray Arts Centre with music by the Ken Foster band. Felicia and Brian have celebrated New Year’s Eve for 39 years. We met at a dance school in Boston and became great partners. Through using Your Journey Of You methods, I noticed that my dancing has changed. My posture is much straighter and our dancing is much smoother. Watch us glide smoothly across the floor. BN
BRIAN’S DEBUT
IF TOOLS COULD TALK
If tools could talk they might have a hard time getting along with other tools because they are so different from each other. However, all the different kinds of tools are needed to build a house. People also have very different talents. In a team all of the different talents make a team powerful. BN
Felicia’s Ballet Recital
OK! I did it! My first ballet recital ever. I learned a lot about Fear, and how I “do” fear. I took notes in my journal, and recorded a series of videos to share what I learned. To see my FEAR videos click on the tab at the top of the page labeled Emotional Tool Box.
Seriously… fear of Ballet? That is so minor, it hardly measures on the Causes of Fear scale. There are BIG Fears with a Capital F… Big fears come to all, and I had my share. But it doesn’t take big fear to color your whole life. Honestly, I’ve lived in a chronic state of Fear, like a low-grade chronic fever.
So, even though fear of a ballet recital seems silly, my fear was real. And because I stopped hiding and pretending nothing was wrong, I learned more from facing this itty bitty fear than from all the Fears I have faced thus far. On the other side of fear, I found a joy that astonished me. Really? Yes, really.
That joy was so inspiring, I wondered, HOW can I KEEP what I learned? For next time.
How can I share it?
I decided to develop a METHOD of facing fear that works. In the videos, I share what I learned so far, and my first steps toward a better approach. I’ll keep working on it. This is a big deal for me. What have you have found that helps YOU overcome fear? I know that together, we have the knowledge and compassion to overcome every fear, even the little ones.
As for the Ballet Recital, it turned out fine, of course. We all had fun. Our teacher was proud of us. The audience clapped and even cheered – I think it was for our bravery. As it turned out, we were so inspiring that two adults asked if they could join the class! I hope they do.
Yes, it was worth it. Recital and all. And if you have any desire to take a ballet class, Go for it! It is never too late to try something new on Your Journey of You.
Joy Principle: On the other side of fear, your joy is waiting.
Love,
Felicia
December 14, 2016 Post # 016
NEW VISION
Post #15 NEW VISION
Enjoy these special photos – taken by my sister Lulu, AFTER her sudden vision loss. That’s right. She can’t see them. I’m in awe. Lulu is showing us HOW to take a sharp turn in Your Journey of You, and come out with a brand new life. This is what happened…
Lulu Farrell is my sister-in-law. I have known her for 36 years. She has always impressed – and intimidated me – with her greatness. Lulu is tiny in size, but her talents are immense. She is a gifted artist, successful entrepreneur, world traveler, benefactor, and so much more. Lulu is incredibly generous with her time, talents, love and money. As a daughter, sister, friend – in all her relationships – Lulu is loyal and dedicated. Several times, I have seen Lulu leave her job and career to devote herself to the consuming task of full-time caregiving. Years and years of caregiving – a sacrifice beyond my comprehension.
Lulu has one gift that amazes me above all. It is the gift of Letting Go. Lulu has repeatedly experienced what other people would call devastating loss. Loss of father, mother, spouse, jobs, careers, homes, health, property. Over and over, I have seen Lulu lose everything – or give it all away – and rise up to create a completely new and beautiful life from nothing.
Two weeks ago, Lulu had another huge loss – the sudden and extreme loss of vision in her right eye. That was her “good eye.” Lulu’s left eye was severely injured many years ago. Now, with her right eye also impaired, Lulu cannot see clearly up close or far away, cannot drive, and faces an unknown future. All the doctors can say is “Wait and see.”
This is especially poignant, since Lulu’s mother was legally blind from macular degeneration. In our family, we are very aware of the emotional, mental and physical hardship of vision loss.
Lulu’s reaction? I’m in awe. She took the full brunt of the news, felt the full range of loss and fear, and Let it Go. She is choosing to embrace her new life. Lulu calls this her next great adventure.
From Landmark Education, Lulu learned “Word creates world.” She has been teaching me for years to watch my language, because the words we speak have power. Our words literally create our world, and give meaning to our experiences.
Lulu’s mother used to say “I can’t see.” Those words created a world of suffering and loss. Most people would call that “reality.” But it isn’t.
Because we always have a choice.
Lulu described an amazing moment when she felt a huge physical wave of loss sweep over her. In that wave was every loss – including the wrenching losses of husband, father and mother. She felt it all. And it passed right through her. Afterward, Lulu felt… freedom. Lightness. Wholeness. A new adventure.
What Lulu will do next, I can’t begin to imagine. But for starters, she plans to celebrate 3 million miles of air travel, by flying to Los Angeles on business – unaccompanied. It will be different, she said, to look out the window and not see the clouds. But what will she do when she lands in LA and can’t see to get around? No problem! Take Uber.
I feel so honored to know Lulu personally. She is a truly great human being – inspiring proof that we can choose joy on the Journey of You – no matter what.
As for me, my own fears and losses seem a lot smaller today. I’m letting go of them. If Lulu can do it, so can I.
Love,
Felicia
December 6, 2016 Post #15
Dark Closets
Our minds have dark closets, with scary, sad moments locked inside. We can huddle outside the door, afraid to open up. We can tell ourselves we “can’t go there” because we are Afraid of the Dark, and the pain, and the monsters lurking inside. We can find people that agree with us. “Oh NO! We can’t go THERE! It is too dark!”
But here is Good News! When we OPEN the door to a dark closet, we can just TURN ON the LIGHT! Darkness is banished where light is shining. Try it and see. Light always wins. We don’t FIGHT darkness. We just turn on light. Pretty simple stuff.
The same is true of panic, depression & mental illness. It is exhausting to FIGHT depression. It is much easier to let in a little light. Then more and more light.
Yes, we can choose struggle, and believe “I’m not READY to see what is inside.” But why suffer?
Because when the light comes on, we see clearly – NO Monsters! Just a bunch of stuff. Beliefs. Stories we tell ourselves. Some good, some not.
WE CHOOSE. Sort it out.
KEEP the good stuff – good memories, useful beliefs, helpful thoughts.
TOSS out the worn out stuff, ragged, too small… Old limiting beliefs we wore when we were three years old, or picked up as a teenager. If it doesn’t fit, isn’t useful, or isn’t true, Let it Go!
Look for the old scary/sad stories we used to tell ourselves. That we were too little. And all alone. That no one cared. That nothing can change… We all have MANY old stories.
Today, with the light ON, we can look at our stories and CHOOSE.
KEEP the Truth – how strong we are, how much we have learned, that we are deeply loved, and our future is so bright.
And let’s bag up the worn out beliefs, and get rid of them. They have no place in our minds anymore.
Joy Principle: This is MY mind. I shine Light in all my dark places, and choose my thoughts. I keep only true, loving, useful thoughts that bring me peace & Joy.
Love,
Felicia
Post #13 Nov 28, 2016
Dance Class
Surprise
Your Journey of You is like Archeology. You don’t use a bulldozer to rip up your life and uncover your true self. You patiently brush off the layers of NOT YOU. And then, sure enough, sooner or later, there you are! Like a diamond in the dirt.
But what happens if you get surprised by what you find? That happened to me yesterday. I uncovered a part of me that I didn’t expect. It was scary at first… like my whole identity fell off. Who I knew myself to be was NOT ME. The person I THOUGHT was me is just another layer – a very crusted stuck-on layer of dirt.
And the ME underneath? My real self is very much like my Dad.
Let me explain. In my old story, to “be like my Dad” was a horrible curse. I left home at age 18, thinking that my folks were all nuts, and I sure didn’t want to be like them! I spent the rest of my life being as UNLIKE my family as I possibly could. I succeeded beyond my wildest dreams. But I lost myself in the process.
Then I went on a Journey to remember who I am.
I began to suspect last year that I was (shudder) “like my Dad.” The very thought shook me like a rumbling earthquake. The summer evening I first had the thought, I was awake most of the night. I went for a walk in at midnight, and started singing out loud every song I remembered my Dad used to sing. I laughed and cried as I remembered his JOY of living, his generous heart, his Good Samaritan acts of kindness, funny stories, how much I love him.
As the buried memories came pouring out. I thought, “Wow, I am like that amazing man, Vinnie Lategano.” That night, a funny, happy me started waking up and peeking out.
Since then, I brushed off many layers of old beliefs, silence and shame. The Real Me began to show up. That’s the Me that is a Limitless Gladiator, dances ballet, makes funny videos and sings like Jimmy Durante.
But yesterday, another big chunk of NOT ME fell off. A layer of protection and defense and hiding cracked apart and fell off like old clay. And in that moment, I was STUNNED! For all these years, I thought I WAS organized, orderly, on time, detail oriented, efficient and precise.
Yesterday, I saw that “Organized Felicia” was my elaborate defense and very successful strategy. And underneath that is a mind that would be labeled ADHD, if I was in the school system today. My mind is bursting with a million ideas, and is so easily distracted that I would float away like a helium balloon without my lists, charts, schedules, and sticky notes to anchor me to earth.
I was truly shocked. And for a day I wondered, do I REALLY want to unleash the Real Me? What ELSE will I learn? Is it SAFE to let the Real Felicia loose?
Life with my family was chaotic, full of drama, cars breaking down, tears and fears, soaring highs and deadly lows, even mental illness, sorrow, hospitals… Do I want to risk THAT to find the Real Me? Can I do that?
The answer from my heart is YES. No matter what. I love and accept myself. I have gained the tools to live and to thrive. I have support. I am not alone anymore. This time, when I open the dark closets, I have NEW beliefs in place of the old beliefs about silence, shame and needing to hide.
Just in time, I decided to love and accept my family just as they are. I see the greatness in them. I see their magnificent capacity to love, their gifts and talents. My healing came just in time, as I now see that I never left my family after all. That I AM like them. And I can love myself.
Or perhaps it is the other way around. I could not see myself until I could love my family.
JOY Principle: I love and accept ALL people, and that includes me. The Real Me brings Joy to my life.
Love, Felicia
Post #11 23 Nov 2016
Walking to Freedom
Post #10 At the Limitless event in Provo Utah, we spent 3 days learning how our minds have great power. With our beliefs, WE DEFINE what we can and cannot do. Don’t like what we have? We can choose new beliefs that help us grow.
On Day 2, we were invited to walk barefoot on broken glass. In that dramatic moment, when I declared “I Am Limitless!” I vowed to do WHATEVER it takes to be really me, break every chain, replace every limiting belief, and create a future of freedom. The catch is, Freedom does not come automatically. Freedom is a choice.
Why choose freedom? Because this is MY Life. I am the one who places limits on what I can do or be. Only I can remove them. It is not the job of government. No president, no employer can give me freedom. No law can be passed . No police can enforce it. No court judge can set me free from the slavery of my own beliefs. Only I can say I Am Limitless. Only I can believe it. And I must do my own work to make it so. It happens moment by moment, day by day.
That’s the good news. And the bad news. Each person chooses for himself. All over the world, throughout human history, it has always been so. I have no time to complain about politics, winners and losers, fair or unfair. I have work to do. I Am Limitless.
Joy Principle: Only I can choose for myself. I choose to be my greatest self. I choose to love and accept myself and others as we really are. With that, I choose Joy.
Love, Felicia
Post #10
November 23, 2016